Empathy and the Power of Pain

            A notion I often associated with psychopaths was that “emotionally sound” individuals were incapable of empathizing with them.  For the first portion of the We Need to Talk About Kevin, I found this to hold true regarding my total lack of understanding toward Kevin and my complete identification with Eva.  Kevin proved to be an entirely new class of annoying than typical children could be, and I struggled even beginning to make sense of why he found sadistic pleasure in convincing Violetta to itch her eczema-ridden skin to a pulp or refusing to be potty-trained at the age of six (Shriver 185; 172).  Eva seemed the primary victim of Kevin’s tyranny, from him painting over her maps with ink after she vocalized her love for them to imitating the intonations of her every word in obnoxious gibberish (129; 158).  However, when Eva throws Kevin against the changing table after he complains about her age and dirties yet another diaper, I found myself shocked and unable to rationalize why she would resort to violence, the very violence I detested Kevin for engaging in (194).  Eva struck as a mother troubled by her abnormal son, and although before I excused her slapping him as a momentary lapse of judgment, throwing someone hard enough to cause him to break his arm is not acceptable no matter how much anger a person feels toward another.

Somehow this form of abuse Kevin endures transformed him into someone humane in my mind, someone who had felt suffering as I had.  Previously it is uncertain whether Kevin really feels anything, which triggers a sense of discomfort in most people, who collectively relate to one another through the shared brokenness of humanity.  Yet as Kevin waits in the pediatric office, Eva notes that although he does not give any verbal signs of pain, “the muscles rippling in his clenched jaw [is] the only indication that it hurt already” (196).  It is not a matter of Kevin feeling nothing, but that he suppresses his feelings well enough to fool most people into believing he has none. My newfound empathy for Kevin makes me no longer question whether he is a psychopath, but rather if psychopaths are beyond understanding.